The end of the world is nigh! May 21st, to be precise. That's the date when Harold Camping, a preacher from Oakland, California, is confidently predicting the Second Coming of the Lord. He says it will begin with an enormous earthquake around 6 p.m. (Would that be Pacific Time? Eastern Time? Greenwich Mean Time? If I knew the correct time zone, I might get a little extra time to repent!)
Camping reckons that 2 per cent of the world's population (the true believers) will instantly disappear and -- poof! -- be immediately "raptured" to Heaven; the rest of us will get sent straight to the Other Place. Or maybe the Other Place comes here to mess with us. I forget. Either way, it's supposed to be bad. All those left behind are basically fucked. The End of Days, the evangelicals call it.
Christ, you get better odds with a lottery ticket! Buster is quite certain he will remain here on terra firma, just another among Earth's many losers. Saturday night around 6, I imagine I'll be enjoying a cocktail or two, but if you should fly past me in mid-air, I'll put down my glass, wave, and wish you bon voyage! It was nice knowing you.